actual chatlog (hilarious!)[audience specific]

12:32:45 AM System
Allen has joined this session!
12:32:45 AM System
Connected with Allen
12:32:53 AM issue
hi
12:32:54 AM Allen
Welcome to Microsoft Customer Service Chat.
12:32:54 AM Allen
How may I assist you?
12:33:02 AM issue
i am having problems with vista.
12:33:02 AM Allen
Hi!
12:33:21 AM issue
the compiler doesnt implement the specs on a off by one error, such that
12:33:33 AM Allen
Okay
12:33:37 AM issue
when i access queue, i get a empty data block.
12:33:54 AM issue
therefore when the buffer is overrun, in hardware or otherwise,
12:34:05 AM Allen
May I know the queue you are referring to?
12:34:17 AM issue
yes, you may.
12:34:28 AM issue
may i know the queue you are referring to?
12:34:56 AM issue
so anyways, the clock is overclocked, thus when i access the ram, or SRAM, or rom, the alu is failing
12:35:12 AM issue
what i neeed isa wireless bus
12:35:25 AM Allen
May I know the edition of Windows Vista you are using (Example: Windows Vista Home Premium)?
12:35:35 AM issue
Windows Vista Home Premium
12:35:56 AM issue
anyways, i think theres clock jitter
12:36:02 AM issue
cauzes the system to go berzerk
12:36:10 AM Allen
Thank you for all the information provided.
12:36:17 AM issue
yes, yes,
12:36:39 AM issue
moreover, when i attempt to access a hidden datablock
12:36:48 AM Allen
As the issue is technical in nature, I would recommend that you work with a Microsoft Support Professional via e-mail, telephone, or chat to resolve the issue.
12:36:51 AM Allen
Please visit the following link to contact the Support Team:
http://support.microsoft.com/oas/default.aspx?ln=en-us&prid=10296&gprid=436922
12:36:52 AM issue
the voltage must have ground bounce
12:37:10 AM Allen
They will be in a better position assisting you in this regard.
12:37:20 AM issue
but is it live?
12:37:39 AM Allen
Yes you may contact them through email, chat or phone.
12:37:44 AM issue
bcos
12:38:22 AM issue
wait, cost 59 dollars?
12:39:05 AM issue
further, when the bootstrap instructin is off
12:39:16 AM issue
chiefly on the 80c188eb
12:39:34 AM issue
however my virtual memory pages are screwed up
12:39:34 AM Allen
You may also avail 90-day no-charge support for your retail copy of Windows Vista.
12:39:54 AM Allen
I would recommend that you contact the technical support team for any further assistance.
and furthermore, when i ...
12:41:09 AM issue
okay, how bout this:
12:41:34 AM issue
when i write my ram, it is degraded when it goes to the rom, and sometimes not at all
12:41:55 AM Allen
I am sorry, I do not have the technical expertise to assist you further in this regard.
12:42:01 AM issue
ok, what about this:
12:42:10 AM Allen
Please contact the above mentioned support team.
12:42:32 AM issue
my screen buffer is encountering off by one erros cosing rolling image
12:43:12 AM issue
and my audio codec buffer is getting clogged, causing a chirpy output with way 2 much info way too condensed
12:43:51 AM issue
more, when i try to get a percentage of memory usage, it is often less than what i expected.
12:44:03 AM issue
the file handles are getting mixed up
12:44:28 AM issue
in my scripts, and the data is going into the queue backwards, thus push and pop are always wrong
12:45:13 AM Allen
I am sorry, for the inconvenience caused to you.
12:45:22 AM issue
the method i wrote for the modular synthesis has arguments which are of don't care value to the method
12:45:35 AM Allen
However, the above all mentioned issues can be assisted by the support team only.

"that's for the guys in materials science to worry about."